Quotes by Mr. Burns:
I’ll keep it short and sweet — Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.
I don’t like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there’s too many fat children.
What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man?
[answering the phone] Ahoy hoy?
Nonsense! Dogs are idiots! Think about it, Smithers. If I came into your house and started sniffing at your crotch and slobbering all over you, what would you say?
Smithers: If you did it, sir?
Ah, Monday morning. Time to pay for your two days of debauchery, you hungover drones.
