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POPSObama To Receive Special Nobel Prize For Replacing Einstein's Theory "Now is that solid or ain't it solid? I mean, except for that fart?" "It's solid!" "No little energy atoms with electrons, wantons and morons!" The president then explained what an idiot Einstein actually was but everyone thought he was smart because he knew a lot of long words. So you heard it here first. President Barack Hussein Obama has won a special Nobel Prize, replacing and disgracing that egghead, Einstein and his energy theory. Obama went on to say, "Look we is all mad up of those atoms and electrons...they repel each other...they are racist....its all relative...you know there are 11 other universes...me and Michelle are hoping to retire to one of them."
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POPS2012 Is Already Here "It started off same as always; coupla fossils saying how our Banjo Patterson was a better poet than Walt Whitman, how Con the Fruiterer is funnier than Seinfeld, only they're Aussies so no one knows about 'em," recalled witness Kevin Porter. "Then this bloke Martin pipes up and says Australia's main problem is that it's stuck in Australia, and everybody says 'Too right!'" "Well, it made sense at the time," Porter added. By 2 a.m., powered by national pride and alcohol, the 3-million-square-mile land mass was barging eastward through the Coral Sea and crossing into the central Pacific, leaving a trail of beer cans and Chinese take-away in its wake. When dawn broke over the Northern Hemisphere, the continent suddenly found itself, not only upside down, but smack in the middle of the Atlantic, and according to most of its 19 million inhabitants, that's the way it's going to stay.
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POPS Hey... Want a Baby? The expression "life is cheap" seems to be true these days. Why in the hell are people like this even allowed to be parents? I guess they didn't think to place an ad in the newspaper. They could've got a lot more from prospective baby seekers. Don't attack me for that statement. It's more a reality than you might know. Anyway...I'm just glad they don't have it any more (the baby that is). But knowing how things things go in our wonderful courts these days, it's possible they can get custody restored. That is if they want the poor thing.
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POPSphoto: Grief More: After a hunter killed her mother, Dorothy was sold as a “mascot” to an amusement park in Cameroon. For the next 25 years she was tethered to the ground by a chain around her neck, taunted, teased, and taught to drink beer and smoke cigarettes for sport.In May 2000 Dorothy—obese from poor diet and lack of exercise—was rescued and relocated along with ten other primates. As her health improved, her deep kindness surfaced. She mothered an orphaned chimp named Bouboule and became a close friend to many others, including Jacky, the group’s alpha male, and Nama, another amusement-park refugee… Sanaga-Yong was founded in 1999 by veterinarian Sheri Speede (pictured at right, cradling Dorothy’s head; at left is center employee Assou Felix). Operated by IDA-Africa, an NGO, it’s home to 62 chimps who reside in spacious, forested enclosures. :cry:
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POPSRefreshment There's something very refreshing about this picture. Must be the beer!
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POPSRandom Thoughts One good turn gets most of the blankets. There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead. If quitters never win, and winners never cheat, then who is the fool who said "Quit while you're ahead"? Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure. What happens if you get scared half to death twice? Multitasking: Screwing up several things at once. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
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POPS Examples Of What Not To Do at The Heartland Institute. "Not only has it failed to cover many people, but all the false promises surrounding it have distracted Maine from doing anything that would actually help improve the situation." 'Costly, Ineffective Failure' "Maine has one of the highest state and local tax burdens. We should not be adding more taxes for this boondoggle, particularly at a time when Maine families are struggling with record high gas and heating oil prices and an uncertain economy." Past a 'Train Wreck' John Garven, president-elect of the Illinois State Association of Health Underwriters, concurs. "Dirigo is the more 'mature' of the * two programs, and it is already past the train wreck stage ." * Massachusetts 'universal health care' schemes Maine Residents Angered by Expansion of Dirigo Program Subsidy
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POPSWish You Were Beer Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, it is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver. I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. Remember: "I" before "E," except in Budweiser. I drink only to make my friends seem interesting. Everybody should believe in something; I believe I'll have another drink. Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXdNnw99-Ic
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POPSObama Has Won The 100 Metres at The 2012 London Olympics
Thus, with President Wilson alone, the Nobel Peace Prize death toll is over 50 million and counting. Occasionally the peace prize has gone to actual peace negotiators but usually, per Teddy Roosevelt, when there was nothing left to negotiate. Carlos Saavedra Lamas got his in 1936 for mediating between Bolivia and Paraguay in the Chaco War (1932-35). Both nations were exhausted, 100,000 soldiers were dead, and the Chaco was--as it had been and remains--a vast, useless weed patch. Likewise, Betty Williams and Mairead Corrigan (1976) and John Hume and David Trimble (1998)--the four of them were standing around when, after 500 years, the fool residents of my ancestral homeland ran out of ammo and beer. Of course, if you go around giving prizes left and right (mostly left) for more than a century, you're bound to give some to worthy people once in a while. With the Nobel committee this usually involves the Red Cross (1901, 1917, 1944, 1963). But the Red Cross doesn't bring peace . . .
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POPS Miller Time Sure, the last Beer Summit was an empty political gesture, something Obama was forced into after he stepped in it.* This one could actually be meaningful, if everyone behaves, sincerely tries to become a better person … which is asking a lot, I know. Likelihood of it happening? Zip. But maybe the White House Press Corps, which initiated the last Beer Summit, could try to prompt this one. By asking the president about it, like they did last time. Checking Google news, not seeing that has happened. * Boston Herald, take a bow. Fired the twin rockets of Sgt. Crowley’s distinctly unracist past and his position as a police academy racial profiling instructor that blew up that race thing in Gates’ and Obama’s faces. I remember watching Gates on CNN that afternoon, and the president at his press conference that night, thinking, “Have a good time, guys. Rockets impact in the a.m.” If Skip had just returned our calls …
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