America is #1 Bill passed


	America is #1 Bill passed

kkcapricorn

7-4-2007 7:47 PM

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tags:

political satire

3 Comments |

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7-5-2007 8:46 AM

phaedrus_cg

#1 mob of wankers...
no wonder north americans are so unloved in the world...

7-5-2007 10:28 AM

Caleythia

I do love the Onion. It's always fun to see how many people will think this is a real article and forward it by e-mail to all their gullible friends.

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<div style="margin: 12px 0px; font-family: arial; color: #333333; background: #ffffff; border: solid 4px #e5e5e5; width: 100%; clear: left;"><div class="CM_CTB_Content_Wrap" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;background-color: #ffffff;"><div style="border-bottom: solid 1px #dcdcdc; white-space: nowrap; margin-bottom: 8px; background-color: #eeeeee ;background-image: url(http://clipmarks.com/images/source-bg.gif); background-repeat: repeat-x; height: 24px; line-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle; padding-bottom: 4px; color: #666666; font-size: 10px;" ><a href="http://clipmarks.com/clip-to-blog/" title="see clips that are hot right now"><img src="http://content.clipmarks.com/blog_embed/e7ab944e-55a8-40dc-9fde-3bdc634b24ed/FA5FF90E-A7EF-42DD-8751-A9C29F621847/" alt="" width="19" height="19" border="0" style="vertical-align: middle; margin: 0px 4px; display: inline; border: none; float:none;" /></a>clipped from <a title="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily" href="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily" style="font-size: 11px;">www.theonion.com</a></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily">With Wall Street booming, the U.S. military standing tall, and Mark McGwire kicking ass and taking names, Congress passed the Helms-Bayh "America Is #1" bill by an overwhelming majority Monday.</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily">My esteemed colleagues, all of us have long known that America is number one," said Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott, announcing the bill's 92-7 passage. "But now it is official. USA! USA! USA!"</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily"><div align="center"><img src="http://content7.clipmarks.com/blog_cache/www.theonion.com/img/33B842A9-440B-431F-8C7F-6F750AF82CF8" alt=" Congress Passes" /></div></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily"><P>Members of Congress cheer the passage of the Helms-Bayh bill.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily"> "yet another victory for America," received near-unanimous approval in the House before breezing through the Senate with little opposition.</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily">America has the biggest GNP, the coolest cars, and the best professional basketball players in the entire world. Under the terms of the bill, any American citizen not liking the new law can go the hell to Russia.</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily"><div align="center"><img src="http://content8.clipmarks.com/blog_cache/www.theonion.com/img/F39C9D6F-DAC3-4628-BD0A-1A614ECDB9A2" alt="Congress Passesjump" /></div></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily"><P>Sen. Jesse Helms (R-NC) taunts a group of visiting French dignitaries.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily">"We're better than Japan,</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily"> we're better than England, </blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38998?utm_source=onion_rss_daily">better than Germany, Canada, France, India, Brazil, Egypt...</blockquote></div><div style="margin: 0px 6px 6px 4px;"><table style="font-size: 11px;border-spacing: 0px;padding: 0px;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"><tr><td style="background:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">&nbsp;</td><td align="right" style="background:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;width:107px" width="107"><a href="http://clipmarks.com/share/FA5FF90E-A7EF-42DD-8751-A9C29F621847/blog/" title="blog or email this clip"><img src="http://content9.clipmarks.com/images/c2b-foot.png" border="0" alt="blog it" width="107" height="17" style="border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;" /></a></td></tr></table></div></div>

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