10 Things I learned from the Discovery Channel

1. The Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John were not written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.

2. Jesus was probably not a Caucasian man. Well I figured that one out on my own. It's annoying how he's always shown as a lanky white boy with Calvin Klein modeling potential.

3. Jesus was a yogi.

4. Some bully with a sword (Constantine) decided which gospels stayed and which were banished. He then made sure the banished ones were destroyed along with the people who continued to read them.

5. Judas and Mary Magdalene also had gospels.

6. Banana peels really are slippery. (from Mythbusters)

7. It's impossible to get tired of watching Planet Earth.

8. Dirty Jobs is an awesome show.

9. Jesus is the most widely depicted figure in the history of art.

10. You should never microwave an egg.

Jesus wasn't white!? JEEESUS!
So he's one of them danged half breeds? One a them varmits from God only knows who and where? (that was funny!) Ya can't trust'em ya know. Can't trust'em for a Bethlehem second!

I kinda doubt he was a Yogi though. A Boo Boo maybe but not a Yogi. Jesus wouldn't steal pickanick baskets no matter who he's from.