This is exactly what happens when you don't let monkeys vote! They take the democracy into their own hands!

I promise, if elected new deputy mayor of Delhi, I will eliminate the glass ceiling, and other ceilings, which prevent monkeys from entering into the ranks and residences of high society. I would defend the 0 hour work week for monkeys. I would continue to fund monkey welfare. And most importantly, I would campaign for universal monkey suffrage. Heck, I'll give each monkey two votes! I promise to do for the monkeys of Delhi what Rudy Giuliani did for his immediate friends and supporters!

Although my opponents have accused me of rampant fruit-barrel spending and blatant pandering to t...

This is exactly what happens when you don't let monkeys vote! They take the democracy into their own hands!

I promise, if elected new deputy mayor of Delhi, I will eliminate the glass ceiling, and other ceilings, which prevent monkeys from entering into the ranks and residences of high society. I would defend the 0 hour work week for monkeys. I would continue to fund monkey welfare. And most importantly, I would campaign for universal monkey suffrage. Heck, I'll give each monkey two votes! I promise to do for the monkeys of Delhi what Rudy Giuliani did for his immediate friends and supporters!

Although my opponents have accused me of rampant fruit-barrel spending and blatant pandering to the macaque lobby, and of having corrupt connections to the Modern Oriental Native Kaucus for Equality and Yogurt, allow me to say this in my defense:

I'M SCARED OF MONKEYS!
I mean, did you see what they did to the last guy?
They threw him out a window!