Her shoes are hot in Serbia, her dress is hot in France, and she’s hot in your brain. She knows she’s a knockout as she struts her stuff into Starbucks and then off to learn Kabbalah while sporting sun glasses that double as a motorcycle helmet. Woo her with celebrity gossip and a borderline gay knowledge of fashion designer’s names.

The Illusionist
She’s got you ball-parking her age at anywhere between 14 and 32. She’s got you telling your friend’s she’s the hottest girl you’ve ever seen as long as she isn’t capable of sending you to jail on dates. The rule of thumb is this: if she’s got the best body you’ve ever seen then she’s too young, as any girl your age has had a few years of binge drinking and a few trips on the boyfriend express to leave her a little bit like a second hand pair of rollerblades- you can still roll but the wheels are a little worn down. Woo the young one with Milton Bradley board games and Miley Cyrus on your iPod.

The Walk of Shame Girl
She’s the girl

Small sacrifice! "...these girls are the reason you stick it out through the sweater and Ugg boots months just waiting for short dresses and bikinis to come..."