I'm no Britney fan, but I think this is all rather nasty.

I just wanted to reach out to all of you and explain some of the things that I have been faced with recently.
Translation: "Dear Gahd, my next album is goin' straight down the shitter unless I salvage the rusted, sinkin' dinghy that is my image."

It's so funny how many stories are put out there about people.
They're not "stories," Britney. Paul Bunyan and his blue ox, Babe, is a story. You neglecting your kids, flashing your vag, shaving your head, and puking in nightclubs is a sad reality.