George Carlin Quotes


	George Carlin Quotes

Brimstone

5-15-2008 4:12 AM

3837 views

tags:

humour

Brimstone says:

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

3 Comments |

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5-15-2008 6:27 AM

WebWolf Hosting

lol @ chinese mothers using toothpicks

5-22-2008 2:21 PM

carrerinyes

Classic!

5-28-2008 10:25 AM

Silkweaver

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<div style="margin: 12px 0px; font-family: arial; color: #333333; background: #ffffff; border: solid 4px #e5e5e5; width: 100%; clear: left;"><div class="CM_CTB_Content_Wrap" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;background-color: #ffffff;"><div style="border-bottom: solid 1px #dcdcdc; white-space: nowrap; margin-bottom: 8px; background-color: #eeeeee ;background-image: url(http://clipmarks.com/images/source-bg.gif); background-repeat: repeat-x; height: 24px; line-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle; padding-bottom: 4px; color: #666666; font-size: 10px;" ><a href="http://clipmarks.com/clip-to-blog/" title="see clips that are hot right now"><img src="http://content.clipmarks.com/blog_embed/324b1ee7-fa39-4121-b53b-17b3561305f3/01BF74C0-8B50-4BDB-BDDC-09799C8E0CCE/" alt="" width="19" height="19" border="0" style="vertical-align: middle; margin: 0px 4px; display: inline; border: none; float:none;" /></a>clipped from <a title="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html" href="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html" style="font-size: 11px;">www.digitaldreamdoor.com</a></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html">Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html"><DIV>If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? </DIV></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html"><DIV>When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day? </DIV></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html"><DIV>I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?</DIV></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html"><DIV>Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.</DIV></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html"><DIV>Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.</DIV></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html">Religion convinced the world that there's an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there's 10 things he doesn't want you to do or else you'll go to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! ...And he needs money! He's all powerful, but he can't handle money!</blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/quotes/george_carlin.html"><DIV>The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.</DIV></blockquote></div><div style="margin: 0px 6px 6px 4px;"><table style="font-size: 11px;border-spacing: 0px;padding: 0px;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"><tr><td style="background:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">&nbsp;</td><td align="right" style="background:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;width:107px" width="107"><a href="http://clipmarks.com/share/01BF74C0-8B50-4BDB-BDDC-09799C8E0CCE/blog/" title="blog or email this clip"><img src="http://content7.clipmarks.com/images/c2b-foot.png" border="0" alt="blog it" width="107" height="17" style="border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;" /></a></td></tr></table></div></div>

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