Dogs provide security when away from the car and if you run out of food, you haven’t quite run out of food– if you know what I mean. Name him after your last boss before profitable jobs were made illegal by the United Globe of Governments.

Pick your criminal underworld gang carefully. You can choose between the PompaDodds, the Lispy Franks and the Pelosidactyls. If offered a brand or a facial tattoo to show gang loyalty, it’s a good sign.

Buy lots of dog food from Costco or Walmart. If you get it by the case, and it’s made in China you can get it cheap. Plus lead poisoning has been known to aid night-vision. This food is not for the dog. This is for human consumption only. The dog has to eat from the new McDonald’s all-organic menu.

Since the Freedom Of Speech Act made talk radio illegal, only National Socialist Public Radio is available. Don’t listen to NSPR without the aid of caffeine, amphetamines or else sleep-driving will occur.

Mount an MK 38 25-mm machine gun to the hood of your car. It’s useful for protecting your fuel supply from the Wealth Redistribution Force. It’s also good for killing giant mutant scorpions.